Project a life in a white box, yourself sitting on cold, solid ground. Your skin interacts with no form of life, to know who you are and why you become, to see how you are and where you are.
But what the real term of answer is what the question is, deep down you imagine, you try to know what is where and what is who, in life you feel who you are, without any mirror, you know who you are and then come a question, inside, what am I?
Everything we do just simply reflects on us. I could not think of a proper term to describe myself. I really am not a mess but it might be just me who is making things complicated than it already has. Life, of course has its valuable lesson to teach someone. I would not want to believe that mine has not arrived. Relationships fail, school sucks, friends lie, unsupportive family members and a very unstable self. I think my life has screwed me a little where by I can choose to be in the wrong path or the right one. People tell me about God and what He can offer then I ask myself, “I’m His creation, what happened?”
I don’t like to make a big deal out of anything unless I am rejected or not entertained. Yo, I know that’s life but what the heck I do whatever I want.
You know how love life can fuck you up sometimes? I realized I fall in love too easily but hardly get out of it. It gets harder when they give so much love as a friend but I probably mistook those feelings as something special. Sucky enough for me to cry over the same thing over few months. I will give up on them eventually but it takes a whole lot of time because during that-getting-over-it period, is the same person who once stepped into my life, meddles with my heart, again. I could not get any better by then. I was probably falling in love over again and left hanging after a while. Shit happens but all I wanted was just someone to love and them to love me back so that we can do everything together. Its hard to express feelings nowadays, for sure because you have no idea who that other person is seeing and that you do not want to try asking because it will make you insecure, self-centered or even a little desperate. I will never get better at love. Makes me have no faith in loving someone or even trusting them. Words exist that is probably why I’m hurt.